This December will mark five years that Kaitlyn has been gone. Where did the time go? So much has changed. Not only have I made major changes, but the world has changed. It is so different now then when she walked this planet. I often wonder how she would handle or digest what is going on. Another part of me is glad that she doesn’t have to be faced with the bull crap du jour. I left my hometown almost four years ago. I feel like I left and never looked back. I miss my family and friends but that is about it. I don’t miss much more other than really good sushi.
The lessons I have learned while dealing with my grief have been quite valuable. Not only has grief shown me that life is too short and to make the best of it and live, it has shown me what I am able to endure. It has helped me recognize when I am deeply depressed. Being depressed is part of grief, but it doesn’t mean you have to be every day. Recently I found myself grieving again. All the same grief characteristics popped up too. I am still working through it.
My grief came from having to leave a job I absolutely loved. A job that I considered to be my dream job. I spent almost a week in bed and had little to no interest in doing anything. I didn’t have a choice but to leave the job to avoid the poisonous jab that was being mandated. Even though I worked in Human Resources at a hospital and didn’t come in contact with patients, the thought process was that I may come into contact with employees who had been around patients who were sick.
After being “sick” for four days, I called my boss and explained I was too depressed to come back. I couldn’t see the point of returning to do a job that I was going to be fired from in a couple of weeks. It wasn’t like I was doing my job poorly, I had just had my three year annual review and it was glowing. I wasn’t losing it because I found a better opportunity. No, I was losing it because I didn’t want to have something that frightens me to the core of my being injected into my body.
Since I worked in Human Resources, I knew the “exemption” process would be tainted. Mostly by the fact that the process of reviewing them changed frequently. First it was just HR would review them. Then the hospital’s attorney was added to the review process. Then the process was changed to add the CEO. After I left, it was changed yet again to a panel of management staff as part of the review process via a Zoom meeting. Talk about intimidating.
I haven’t even mentioned the bullying emails sent out by the CEO. The first one was on Labor Day. A staff wide email was sent advising that the jobs of the unvaxxed would be posted until they were vaxxed or had an approved exemption. What kind of mind fuck is that? This is a hospital with a four star campaign to treat their patients like family. Makes you wonder what type of family the CEO and other hospital administration staff have. I would never treat my family that way. There were subsequent emails that followed which had the tone of coercion and were no better. The emails lacked any empathy. Why would I want to stay here anyway?
I worked at a hospital. I was taught how to go to the VAERS website and look up all the side effects being reported. This is a government website that “is the nation’s early warning system that monitors the safety of vaccines after they are authorized or licensed for use by the US Food and Drug Administration. VAERS is part of the larger vaccine safety system in the United States that helps make sure vaccines are safe”. The last two sentences are from the VAERS website. When one thinks clearly and logically, you have to wonder why there are over 700,000 reported adverse reactions. At the time before I left my job, there were only 600,000 adverse reactions reports. I left a month ago.
I have been through so much in life. I am not afraid to die because I know that I get to see Kaitlyn. I don’t want to die yet either. I want to live a full life knowing she is watching and waiting for me to join her one day when it is time. Grief has taught me to persevere no matter what happens. No mater how much it hurts. KEEP GOING!
Some people have told me it was my choice. I don’t quite understand how a mandate is a choice. There are no choices with a mandate. Some people have told me thank you for standing up. That I am brave to give up my job. That when this is over, I will have been on the right side of history and for my own health.
The bottom line is keep going no matter what type of crap you are faced with. Follow your beliefs. Know what is right from wrong. Stand up for yourself. Fight for what is right. Don’t just blindly accept.
I love my family and friends. I respect any decisions they make on their own. I hope all turns out well for those who had the jab. I hope all turns out well for America.
I will hold the line until I die. I am not afraid to die for what I believe in. I don’t even care if I lose friends or family over this blog. We have to take a stand and fight for what is right. We the people need to put the government in check. They work for us–that is what our tax dollars pay for.
Peace, light, love and good health to all.